by Alex Kemp
The Bureau of Justice Statistics reported a meta-analysis of 80 studies found that the average prevalence rate of sexual revictimization was 47.9% for all victims.
So, this is how “it” happens.
The first time I was 11 and “it” was my father’s best friend
The next time I was 13 and “it” was my best friend’s big brother’s best friend
The next time I was 16 and “it” was a boy who said we would just play video games
The next time I was 17 and “it” was a man, throwing me cash while I crawled out of the back seat
The next time I was 18 and “it” was a date, where we watched a baseball game and I bled the next day
The next time again—
I was 18 and “it” was a teacher who had promised me piano lessons
The next time again
The next time again
The next time again
So, all the time now,
I hate men who are protective
And meeting people’s friends of friends
And playing any sort of game
And riding in a Mercedez Benz
And the Marlins
And watching fingers press into piano keys
Is this body even human anymore?
When I die, I hope they cremate me
Spread my ashes over my parade of predatory men
Confetti-shaped reminders of their carnal indifference
Let it fall atop and all over their skin
Let it land on their hands and necks and arms and face
Let it linger
Let it stick to them, over and over, again and again
And again
And again
And again
***
Alex Kemp (she/her) is a poet and film writer. Her work focuses primarily on the working class, southern culture, memory, and these theme’s intersections with women. Currently, Alex lives between Brooklyn, New York and the Alabama Gulf Coast.
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