by Tyson Higel
During your clinical rotation in the ED,
as a student nurse,
the registered nurse you're with tells you,
"We're going to start an IV on this patient coming in,"
and your feelings swirl between
inadequacy,
uncertainty,
and, I'm ready.
You've done them before, sure, but you want to be better.
Can I be better? How will it go this time?
Remember last time, when you . . . But never mind that,
you tell yourself: Be a go-getter.
And so you don a fake confidence,
and start the IV.
Maybe it goes well. Maybe it goes unsuccessfully.
Whatever the outcome, you can learn from how you did.
And that's all it is: Practice and repetition,
rinse and repeat.
Do it enough, and you'll (finally!) reach the point
where you don't have to fake your confidence anymore.
It only takes time.
So be kind to yourself, you're going to make it.
I, too, was in your shoes before.
***
Tyson Higel is a nursing student living in Bellingham, WA. If he's not with patients or studying his coursework, he is, almost certainly, working on his poems and short stories. His poetry has recently appeared in Corridor and The Kings River Review.
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